Comedian Louis C.K. Learns About the Catholic Church (Video)

Comedian Louis C.K. Learns About the Catholic Church (Video) | Third Monk image 3

Driven by simple curiosity, Louis C.K. does some investigative reporting and finds some surprising things about the Catholic Church

This is a pretty old clip (2007) and certainly doesn’t reach Louis’ current level of comedy, but it’s worth watching.

It’s super tongue-in-cheek (or is it dick-in-ass), but it actually raises some valid points. Regardless of your religious beliefs, we can all agree boy-fucking blows.

Whiskey, Tango, Foxtrot.

:)

Louis C.K. just doesn't care

Comedians on Psychedelics (Video)

Comedians on Psychedelics (Video) | Third Monk image 1

00:10 – Doug Stanhope
05:07 – Joe Rogan
07:56 – Bill Hicks
13:22 – George Carlin
15:34 – Duncan Trussell

Comedians are good at describing stories in vivid, interesting ways. That’s what makes listening to these world-class comics share their psychedelic experiences so cool.

Featuring Doug Stanhope, Joe Rogan, Bill Hicks, George Carlin, and Duncan Trussell, Comedians on Psychedelics attempts to aid us in piercing the veil behind our illusory reality.

These are real people attempting to give their own piece of the experiential puzzle with as little distortion as the limits of language and memory allow. It’s not perfect, but besides first-hand psychedelic experience, it’s the best we’ve got.

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Getting Doug with High, Comedians and Stoners Podcast – Part 2 (Video)

Getting Doug with High, Comedians and Stoners Podcast - Part 2 (Video) | Third Monk image 2

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Doug Benson invites his stoner comedian friends on Getting Doug with High for a weekly smoke session. The podcast starts with a ceremonial toke circle with the guests getting to choose their favorite method of getting stoned from Doug’s wide selection of tools.

Doug gets into the High History of each guest to reminisce about the first time they met Mary Jane. As eyes get heavier and smiles get wider, Doug unleashes random games and magic tricks to trip out his guests.

Workaholics

Adam, Blake, and Anders from join Doug Benson on an episode of Getting Doug with High to talk about how cannabis influences the humor behind their hilarious show, Workaholics.

Tommy Chong

Doug Benson is back with another episode of Getting Doug with High with a VERY special guest, stoner legend Tommy Chong.

Reggie Watts and Broad City

Doug Benson welcomes Reggie Watts, Ilana Glazer & Abbi Jacobson (from Broad City) to the show.

Ari Shaffir

Doug Benson is joined by Ari Shaffir, host of the comedy story telling show This is Not Happening for another episode of Getting Doug with High.

Getting Doug Live – Harris Wittels, Eric Andre

Getting Doug with High broadcast live from Largo in Los Angeles with guests Eric Andre, Rory Scovel, Harris Wittels (Parks and Rec, Eastbound and Down), Jonah Ray, and Steve Agee.

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Our first set of Getting Doug With High includes appearances from Joey Diaz, Aubrey Plaza, and Jeff Ross.

Don’t Smoke Me Out With Garbage Weed – Joey Diaz (Video)

Don't Smoke Me Out With Garbage Weed - Joey Diaz (Video) | Third Monk image 1

A classic Joey Diaz moment on the Joe Rogan Experience Podcast gets animated. Joey is tired but still makes the long late night drive to Joe’s studio to record an episode.

The pre game ritual is to stimulate the mind by getting high as fuck. Joey isn’t too happy when the Susquehanna smoke session is over, and he’s not as stoned as he expects to be.

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Joey Diaz Susquehanna Weed Rant (Podcast Video)

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Bill Hicks – Marijuana Should Be Mandatory (Video)

Bill Hicks - Marijuana Should Be Mandatory (Video) | Third Monk image 2

Bill Hicks calls for mandatory marijuana, setting everyone straight on which drugs are better.

So I don’t drink. I don’t do drugs…anymore.

I used to take drugs and I quit, but I’ll tell you something. I have nothing against drugs whatsoever, that’s kinda weird, huh? Never heard that one, used to take drugs, quit, and have nothing against them. Wow, never heard that, let’s hear more. Okay.

I’ll tell you something else, and I know this is not a very popular idea, you don’t hear very often anymore, but it’s the truth. I have taken drugs before, and uh, I had a real good time.

Sorry.

Didn’t murder anybody, didn’t rob anybody, didn’t rape anybody, didn’t beat anybody, didn’t lose hmmm, one fucking job. Laughed my ass off and went about my day.

Sorry.

Now, where’s my commercial?

Shit I’ll be the guy holding that skillet in that commercial, man. That ain’t a brain, that’s breakfast. Let’s eat. What have been up – five days now? I’m fucking starving.

I find that commercial a tad insulting to my intelligence, you know the one, here’s your brain. I’ve seen a lot of things on drugs, but I have never, ever, ever looked at an egg, and thought it was a fucking brain. Not once.

I have seen UFO’s split the sky like a sheet, but I have never looked at an egg and thought it was a fucking brain, not once. I have had 7 balls of light come off of a UFO lead me on to their ship, explain to me, telepathically that we are all one and that there is no such thing as death, but I have never looked at an egg and thought it was a fucking brain.

Now, maybe I wasn’t getting good shit.

That’s what I hate about the war on drugs, I’ll be honest with you. It’s what I can’t stand, is all day long we see those commercials: here’s your brain, here’s your brain on drugs, why do you think they call it dope. And then the next commercial is: This bud’s for you, come on everybody, let’s be hypocritical bastards. It’s okay to drink your drug, we meant those other drugs, those untaxed drugs. Those are the ones that are bad for you.

Nicotine, alcohol, coincidently taxed drugs, ooo, how does this fucking work? Thank god they’re taxing alcohol man, it means we got those good roads we can get fucked up and drive on. Thank god they’re taxing this shit man, we’d be doing donuts in a wheat field right now, thank god we’re on a highway, woo, this is a good drug.

Cause I’ll tell you something, Ill be honest man, if I was going to legalize a drug it sure wouldn’t have been alcohol. Sorry. There are better drugs and better drugs for you, that’s a fact, you may stop your internal dialogue.

But, Bill, alcohol is an acceptab- shut the fuck up, you’re wrong..kay? kay.

Shit, not only do I think marijuana should be legalized. I think it should be mandatory. I’m a hard liner.

Think about it man, you get in traffic behind somebody. *Honks*

Shut up and smoke that, it’s the law.

Oh, sorry. I was taking life seriously. Oh man, who’s hungry?

That’d be a nice world wouldn’t it? Quiet, mellow, hungry, high people everywhere. Just Domino’s pizza trucks passing everybody. Every single highway, parades of Domino’s.

Let them get stuck in traffic, all our pizzas will be free.

I’m a fucking dreamer man…But I’m not the only one.

Dreamers, man.

Pot is a better drug than alcohol, fact, FACT. Stop your internal dialogue. But, Bill, alcohol is an accepta- shut up. You’re wrong get over it. Kay? Kay.

I’ll prove it to you man, you’re at a ball game or a concert and someone’s really violent and aggressive and obnoxious, are they drunk or smoking pot?

They’re drunk.

I have never seen people on pot get in a fight, because it is fucking impossible.

Hey buddy.

Hey, what?

Hey.

Hey.

End of argument.

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Getting Doug with High, Doug Benson’s Stoner Podcast (Video)

Getting Doug with High, Doug Benson's Stoner Podcast (Video) | Third Monk image 1

getting-doug-with-high-aubrey-plaza-Alia Shawkat

Doug Benson invites his stoner comedian friends on Getting Doug with High for a weekly smoke session. The podcast starts with a ceremonial toke circle with the guests getting to choose their favorite method of getting stoned from Doug’s wide selection of tools which includes a broken Volcano vaporizer.

Doug gets into the High History of each guest to reminisce about the first time they met Mary Jane. As eyes get heavier and smiles get wider, Doug unleashes random games and magic tricks to trip out his guests.

Joey Diaz

Joey Diaz brings his medical cannabis infused “goomy bears” and gets Doug stoned to the gills.

Aubrey Plaza & Alia Shawkat

Doug Benson smokes weed with Aubrey Plaza (Parks and Recreation) and Alia Shawkat (Arrested Development) on another episode of Getting Doug with High.

Eric Andre

Doug Benson gets Doug with Eric André, the star of “The Eric André Show” on Adult Swim.

Jenny Slate

Doug Benson smokes with his very first guest, Jenny Slate (Parks and Recreation).

Jeff Ross

Doug Benson welcomes the Roastmaster General Jeff Ross to the show for another episode of “Getting Doug with High”.

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Subscribe to Doug Benson’s Youtube channel for more Getting Doug with High episodes featuring comedians like Anthony Jeselnik and Sarah Silverman.

Demetri Martin – One Liner Joke Gifs

Demetri Martin - One Liner Joke Gifs | Third Monk image 15

Short jokes, big laughs. Demetri Martin‘s short joke word play is just one feature in his wide array of comedic talents.

B-Batteries

Short Joke - Demetri Martin_B Batteries

 

Bungee Jumping

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Catapults

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Futon World

Demetri-Martin-FUTON-WORLD

 

“Get Well Soon.”

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Hangman

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Heart Attack

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Insult to Injury

Demetri-Martin-INJURY

 

Puzzles

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What is Cool all About?

Demetri-Martin-SLEEVES

 

Someone Else

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Sponsors

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Tennis

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Joe Rogan Experience – The Best of Joey Diaz (Video)

Joe Rogan Experience - The Best of Joey Diaz (Video) | Third Monk image 1

The Joe Rogan Experience Podcast has become synonymous with consistently funny and enlightening content. With some of the dopest guests around, it’s easy to see why.

Stand-up comic Joey Diaz is a frequent guest, and he’s fucking hilarious!

Best of Joey Diaz – Vol. 1

Best of Joey Diaz – Vol. 2

Best of Joey Diaz – Vol. 3

If you’re not gonna eat her ass for breakfast… why buy breath mints? – Joey Coco Diaz

joey diaz> Joey Coco Diaz | Official Website of Coco